this morning #579.

this morning, as he tried to tease out his hair in front of the mirror, he tried to tease out how this had happened to him. the last thing that he remembered was sitting in the living room with his fifth whiskey coke & another episode of rick & morty while his roommates sat in the kitchen playing poker. had they waited for him to pass out & then punk’d him? he tried dragging a comb through the back of his hair but was getting nowhere, so he brought a full-length mirror in from the next room to check out the back of his head. all at once, it clicked into place. worry over whiskey breath had led to him chewing gum right before passing out. damnit. today would be the day he’d have to shave his head.