this morning #976.

this morning, the butterflies had already begun. they’d begun about a month ago. today, they’re really flapping away in there. i don’t want to call it a panic attack quite yet. let’s hope we don’t get there. “nervous energy.” let’s call it that. systematic deep breaths. after all the recent drama, there’s a lot riding on my wife’s reaction to what i have in store for her today. all wives live for this shit but this is different. the pressure is killing me. i can tell she feels that something big is coming, that i’ve planned something more advanced than roses & a dinner reservation. she’s hard to surprise, so i guess i’m ok with her knowing that much & nothing more. at least she’s been less nosy than usual.