this morning #2000.

this morning, he made his way up to the podium, shuffled a few papers around, took a swig of water & began to make a statement. though we already knew what he was going to say, we all showed up anyway. had to just in case the event went sideways. “good morning. thank you all for coming. as you’re likely aware, lately there’s been a lot of talk about my private life. while i’d prefer that my private life remain private, i feel that i owe you some answers. you demand it. for the past year, i haven’t been entirely candid. in january, i had relations with a member of my staff. last week, she gave birth to a boy—my son. for now, we ask for privacy. thank you.” with that said, he took no questions. stood up & fled.