this morning #1253.

this morning, i held the hug. one. two. three. sighed. released. held my hands there, unhinged in the air, reaching, unsure of where to let them land. i went with tucking them into my armpits, folded my floppy arms tight across my chest. said one more futile goodbye. let that devolve into a ramble. tried to jam in an additional extraneous excuse, acted as if delaying his departure one second longer would make the future pain less sharper. he kept quiet, even as the boarding calls started to come over the loudspeaker, let me go on just a little bit longer. then he cut me off. he really had to go. these trains wait for no one. i nodded “OK.” watched him walk away. he looked back one last time. i waved.